By Jerr Rrej
Masculine awakening author Jerr Rrej explains why relationship counselling sessions don’t work and should never be a place a man goes to.
A lot of men are told that only open communication can solve relationship problems and so they follow this advice by women.
Are these men making their relationships worse or better?
It is common for men to follow female advice in repairing a relationship with talk/therapy.
What does it mean to talk?
This definition is different between males and females. A woman will talk to be heard without seeking solution while a man will talk to determine an issue for solution. Two separate meanings to communication. This is key to understanding why talk fails.
What happens when a man and woman try to talk through their problems in a relationship? They will either escalate the issue with tired emotion or will repeat themselves in a loop. It could be hours, days or weeks of talking through an issue with no solution.
The Wall Speaks book is about masculine frame, it teaches how to live with one woman. Frame is not about promiscuity.
Why does the talk keep looping without solution? Because one person is not submitting to the other. It is that simple. And a man who tries to talk through issues is following the rules of a female game of communication. This sets him up as equal in power with the female.
Communication is not just about “figuring out an issue”, it is about resolving the issue. And how can we resolve a communication breakdown? Through negotiation tactics. Remember, a loop continues because both sides refuse to submit to break the loop. This is why talk increases.
The best way for a man to solve problems in a relationship is through strong negotiation tactics that secure his authority. War, business and romance have more in common than apart. Is talk the best way to solve war or a business negotiation? Most times no.
The best way to solve relationship problems is not to start talking to solve them. Most times a woman will solve a problem herself to fix the relationship. If a man walks away like in business, fear of loss will inspire the negotiation. The other side will negotiate to themselves
But what a man must realize about female nature is that they are pros at solving relationship problems without talking about it. But even if a woman wants to talk, she just wants to be heard and understood even if the issue remains.
Remember, love is war and requires strong negotiation like business. And the more one side wants to talk in war, business or love, the more they project desperation and therefore weakness. This is why females get emboldened over talkative males.
Learn frame. Pick it up and carry it. Strong silent frame wins more negotiations more than any desperate chatter would. Women love giving power away to frame. Been like that since the beginning and will not change anytime soon.
Be proud my man.
And keep winning.
Jerr Rrej is the author of The Wall Speaks.
The Wall Speaks is an easy to read guide on learning masculine frame.